It is an unfortunate truth that we have to teach our kids about the horrors of the world, such as what happened in New York City on September 11, 2001. Doing so, however, should be a concept learned little by little, line upon line, as they grow. Here are some sensitive ways to teach about 9-11 .
Introducing Young Children to 9-11
A few years ago, when my son (my oldest) was three years old, we were driving to church on September 11 when my son noticed the flag at half mast. He asked me the question that haunted me at the time: “Why is the flag coming down?”
I told him that many years ago on that day some bad men stole an airplane and killed a lot of people. We fly the flag half way up to remember that lots of people died.
“Who were the people that died?” he responded. “Tell me their names.”
I didn’t have any names for him. I didn’t, in fact, know any of the 3,000 people who died that day. I didn’t even see the television coverage until after I returned home from campus a few hours after the fact. I found out about the towers as I walked in to my economics class at 9 a.m. Mountain Time, just 20 minutes after I’d finished reading the New York Times and heading out for class.
It struck me, though, that his first reaction was to connect with the people who died. He could have said, “Why would bad men do that?” but no, he knows that some people are bad in the world. He just wanted to remember along with me and all the others that put our flag at half mast. I had just told him that we lower the flag to remember. He was remembering through me. In some respects, that is enough of history to comprehend for preschoolers!
Remembering the Helpers on September 11
As children get older, it may be helpful to understand the positive amidst the tragedy.
I was spared from any great disasters when I was little, but there was plenty of news of them in newspapers and on the radio, and there were graphic images of them in newsreels.
For me, as for all children, the world could have come to seem a scary place to live. But I felt secure with my parents, and they let me know that we were safely together whenever I showed concern about accounts of alarming events in the world.
There was something else my mother did that I’ve always remembered: “Always look for the helpers,” she’d tell me. “There’s always someone who is trying to help.” I did, and I came to see that the world is full of doctors and nurses, police and firemen, volunteers, neighbors and friends who are ready to jump in to help when things go wrong.
The quote from Fred Rogers above is never more important than when we are teaching our kids about sad events that happened. September 11, 2001 is such an event that can be remembered through the helpers. It’s also helpful to remember that September 11 is now remembered as Patriot’s Day, so it is a good time to study the Pledge of Allegiance or national leaders.
September 11 Kids Books for Younger Children
The following books are good “helper” books for younger readers. Of course, parents need to take in to consideration their own children’s sensitivity. Already reread a book first to determine if it is appropriate for your child.
- Fireboat: The Heroic Adventures of the John J. Harvey by Maira Kalman. In this book, a retired old fireboat becomes a hero as he fights to put out the fires on September 11.
- Saved by the Boats: The Heroic Sea Evacuation of September 11 by Julie Gassman. Downtown Manhattan was quite crowed by 10 a.m. on September 11. This tells how nearly half a million people were rescued by boat and taken to surrounding boroughs.
- 14 Cows for America by Carmen Agra Deedy. In a small village in Kenya, local villagers give America a gift of a 14 cows, an extraordinary gift for their rural community to give, given as a symbol of hope to help ease the pains of American’s grieving hearts.
- The Survivor Tree: Inspired by a True Story by Cheryl Somers Aubin. A month after the collapse of the Twin Towers, green leaves of a pear tree appear under the debris and ash. The tree became a symbol of hope and survival in the midst of hardship.
- The Man in the Red Bandanna by Honor Crowther Fagan. A man who always carried his father’s red bandanna used it to save the lives of many people from the upper flowers of the South Tower.
- September Roses by Jeanette Winter. Two sisters from South Africa, travelling to a flower show, end up stranded in New York City on September 11, 2001 with boxes of roses. Their floral tributes to the those who died comforted those assisting in the rescues.
- The Little Chapel that Stood by A.B. Curtiss. This poem gives tribute to a small chapel that stood in the shadow of the Twin Towers. Remarkably, no damage was done to the chapel as first responders dropped their boots and heavy equipment at the gates of the church.
- Seven and a Half Tons of Steel by Janet Nolan. New York State gave the U.S. Navy seven and a half tons of steel that were in World Trade Center. As the Navy worked with the steel, it became the bow of a powerful Navy ship.
- America is Under Attack by Don Brown. A straight forward historical picture book about the events of September 11.
Easing In to More September 11 Facts
When my kids are older, I feel we can have a little bit more discussion about history. For example, when my early elementary child was asking more questions, I decided we’d watch the BrainPop featured movie together (subscription required, but it usually is free to watch on September 11 each year). The movie raised even more questions. He could not comprehend what a terrorist is, and why or how someone would do what they did.
Now my second child will be entering to this stage, and my older child is the one who wants to explain it to her. Yikes!
I’m okay with building little by little each year. It is a tragedy that I’d rather not have to try to explain. But as he grows in understanding of the good that happened that day too, I feel he is reassured in our safety in the world.
Books about 9-11 for Older Children
Fictionalized stories, as well as more detailed nonfiction, are more appropriate for older children who can understand bad and good in the world without become tramatized. Here are some books I’ve enjoyed. I am excited to introduce some of these to my fifth grader this year.
- I Survived the Attacks of September 11, 2001 by Lauren Tarshis. A child takes a bus downtown to visit his uncle’s firehouse, only to find himself in the midst of the chaos.
- What Were the Twin Towers? by Jim O’Conner. From the What Was? series, this book provides a factual look at history.
- Towers Falling by Jewell Parker Rhodes. Fifteen years after September 11, Deja and her friends learn about the history of the Twin Towers and the 9-11 attack, an event that happened before she was born but that directly impacts her life on a daily basis, showing how history impacts the present.
- Nine, Ten: A September 11 Story by Nora Raleigh Baskin. Four different children tell their stories in the early days of September 2001. It’s only a year later that we see how they are all connected. Although this book does not take place on September, it gives an amazing glimpse into how events in one part of the world influence us all.
- Eleven by Tom Rogers. Alex Douglas turns 11 on 9/11/2001 and his day turns out a bit more different than he imagined!
- 10 True Tales: Heroes of 9/11 by Allan Zullo. Learn about the first responders and other every-day heroes that came at the call on September 11.
Each child approaches tragedy in a different way. How will you approach the subject with your children this year?